Taking Aim

[CanadianScroller]

Kevin I like what you are doing with the pattern.
The angle of the dock leads right into the picture.
The mountains offer a good counterbalance to the dock
The negative space in the water is good too.
About the only thing I would do is maybe shorten the reflection a little to give a little more negative space. Or reduce the number of lines in the reflection to also increase the negative space.
This may not be optically correct but it may be more tranquil
The mountain on the left side is a great way to draw the eye back into the picture.

[Jediscroller]

Carl,
Thanks a ton for the input. I understand what you mean by shortening the reflection (VERY difficult at this point, hehehe). What I need clarification on is what you mean by eliminating some of the lines in the reflection. By this, do you mean joing some for larger black areas or eliminating them altogether for larger white areas.
I noticed another area I want to modify in looking at it as well. The reflection on the left needs some of the black removed to better match the top (oops).

[Jediscroller]

Originally Posted by BobD

I don't have a problem with anything already posted! This is a great thread!!!!!

Bob

BTW...Ive been kicking around the idea of having a top thread area...where the members can vote on the best threads and I'll start a new area with redirects to the origional threads...so you can see the threads in two places...make sense?

Bob

Just in case you thought I missed this one Bob. I like it! I'm not sure how you would do it but that's what you're here for, LOL.

[Gill]

Bob & Neal - have you got anything to add to the points we've already touched upon? Do you think we've overlooked anything important? What else should we be considering? I understand that you've got a background in graphic design, Bob, and Neal's definitely got a lot of experience.

Kevin - I'm a bit confused by the area just above the the bank of the lake. Are those trees? At that distance, I'm not sure quite so much detail would be visible. I'm also wondering if you could reduce the thickness of the lines around the mountain tops; the outlines would lose definition as they recede into the distance.

Something else you might want to consider is the effect of the light. The sun appears to be in front of the chair and slightly to the right - I'd expect to see the chair cast more shadow falling on the decking towards the center of the picture. I'd also expect to see more shadow on the sides of the mountains that fall away from the sun.

I hope you don't mind these comments. They're offered in the spirit of friendship as suggestions that might perhaps help to polish a lovely, tranquil pattern. It should look good when it's cut .

Gill

[Jediscroller]

Originally Posted by Gill

Kevin - I'm a bit confused by the area just above the the bank of the lake. Are those trees? At that distance, I'm not sure quite so much detail would be visible. I'm also wondering if you could reduce the thickness of the lines around the mountain tops; the outlines would lose definition as they recede into the distance.

Something else you might want to consider is the effect of the light. The sun appears to be in front of the chair and slightly to the right - I'd expect to see the chair cast more shadow falling on the decking towards the center of the picture. I'd also expect to see more shadow on the sides of the mountains that fall away from the sun.

I hope you don't mind these comments. They're offered in the spirit of friendship as suggestions that might perhaps help to polish a lovely, tranquil pattern. It should look good when it's cut .

Gill

Gill,
If I was concerned about critiques, this would've been the last thread I would've posted a pattern in ROFL! This is exactly the type of stuff I hoped for.
To answer your question, yes, those are trees, I tried leaving them in while not making them too detailed. I really like the shadow suggestion, it's one of those things I should've known but that's what an extra pair (or several extra pairs) of eyes does.
Now, on to my question for you, when you say thinning the lines above the mountain tops, do you mean just near the peaks or the entire line? I'm thinking tapering the lines but I'm not sure if that's how you meant it.
Thanks a ton for the input.
I'll be taking yours and Carl's (and anyone else who chimes in) suggestions and putting them to use on this one before it's cut. Should provide an excellent learning experience for me and hopefully others to see the evolution from pattern first draft to final cut.

[Gill]

Kevin, you've got a marvellous attitude !

It hadn't occurred to me that a taper might be effective on the mountain top outlines. Good thinking! My only concern is that it might look a little contrived. Why not try a normal fine line for the whole of the mountain top horizon to start with? If it doesn't look right you could always broaden it out.

Gill

Edit

PS Using a thick line on the sides of the mountains that are in shadow and a fine line on those that are in the sunlight is another option to consider.

[CanadianScroller]

Hi Kevin, I messed around with the pattern a bit. Hope you don't mind.
I didn't spend much time on it.
I shortened the reflection and thinned out the mountain lines.
Gill suggested shadows on the chair and dock, also on the mountains making one side thicker than the other. The same could be done for the trees. Defined lines on one side and pure white on the other.
The reflection of the mountain could have a little more white but then again the water is very calm so there isn't much point putting ripples in it.

Thanks for giving us the pattern to look at.

Carl

[Jediscroller]

Ooooh, I like the shortened reflection and thinner lines on the mountains a lot Carl! I'll have to play with it some when I get home tonight to try and get some appropriate shadows stuck in there.

[BobD]

I've learned a lot reading this thread...I really like the way it evolved into taking a pattern apart and seeing what makes it work and what doesn't. I'm swamped still with work (we have an issue of WCI that's got to go out the door next week, and then my deadline to get materials to our art deparment for SSW&C is Oct. 19...so...I'll try to weigh in when I've got more time!

Bob

[CanadianScroller]

Kevin I was just looking at the pictures side by side. If you look over the top of the chair on either picture you will see a darker bolder line in the reflection.
I know I said ripples may take away from the image but I am kinda seeing the dark line as a ripple and I like it
Maybe you could make a couple of darker lines throughout the reflection.

Just a thought.

Carl