Welcome to Scroll Saw Woodworking & Crafts Message Board, an online scroll saw forum community where you can join thousands of scrollers from around the world discussing all things related to Scrolling. To gain full access to the message board you must register for a free account.
As a registered member you will be able to:
* Browse over 200,000 posts.
If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact the Scroll Saw Woodworking & Crafts Support Team.
| ||LinkBack||Thread Tools||Display Modes|
|08-08-2012, 06:59 PM||#1|
IM BACK SORTA
Join Date: Sep 2009
Thanked 24 Times in 17 Posts
Embarrassing medical exams
At the beginning of my shift I placed a stethoscope on an elderly and slightly deaf female patient's anterior chest wall.
'Big breaths,' . . . I instructed.
'Yes, they used to be,' . . . replied the patient.
Submitted by Dr. Richard Byrnes ,
While acquainting myself with a new elderly patient,
I asked, 'How long have you been bedridden?'
After a look of complete confusion she answered . . ..
'Why, not for about twenty years - when my husband was alive.'
Submitted by Dr. Steven Swanson,
I was performing rounds at the hospital one morning and while checking up on a man I asked . . . 'So how's your breakfast this morning?' 'It's very good except for the Kentucky Jelly. I can't seem to get used to the taste.' . Bob replied.
I then asked to see the jelly and Bob produced
A foil packet labeled 'KY Jelly.'
Submitted by Dr. Leonard Kransdorf ,
A nurse was on duty in the Emergency Room
when a young woman with purple hair styled
into a punk rocker Mohawk, sporting a variety
of tattoos, and wearing strange clothing,
entered . . . It was quickly determined that
the patient had acute appendicitis, so she was
scheduled for immediate surgery.. When she was completely disrobed on the operating
table, the staff noticed that her pubic hair had
been dyed green and above it there was a
tattoo that read . . . 'Keep off the grass.'
Once the surgery was completed, the surgeon
wrote a short note on the patient ' s dressing,
which said 'Sorry . . . had to mow the lawn.'
Submitted by RN no name,
AND FINALLY!! ! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ...
As a new, young MD doing his residency in OB.
I was quite embarrassed when performing female
pelvic exams... To cover my embarrassment
I had unconsciously formed a habit of whistling softly.
The middle-aged lady upon whom I was performing this exam suddenly burst out laughing and further embarrassing me.
I looked up from my work and sheepishly said. . ..
I'm sorry. Was I tickling you? '
She replied with tears running down
her cheeks from laughing so hard . . .
'No doctor but the song you were whistling was . . ...
' I wish I was an Oscar Mayer Wiener .'
Dr. wouldn't submit his name.....
Baby's First Doctor Visit
This made me laugh out loud.
I hope it will give you a smile!
A woman and a baby were in the doctor's examining room, waiting for the
doctor to come in for the baby's first exam.
The doctor arrived, and examined the baby, checked his weight, and being a little concerned, asked if the baby was breast-fed or bottle-fed.
'Breast-fed, ' she replied..
' Well, strip down to your waist,' the doctor ordered.
She did. He pinched her nipples, pressed, kneaded, and rubbed both breasts for a while in a very professional and detailed examination.
Motioning to her to get dressed, the doctor said, 'No wonder this baby is underweight. You don't have any milk.'
� I know,' she said, 'I'm his Grandma,
But I'm glad I came. �
|08-09-2012, 04:59 AM||#2|
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Valnesfjord, NORWAY (just north of the Arctic Circle)
Thanked 2 Times in 2 Posts
Laughter is the best medicin! I feel much better after this - thank you Oily!
Ivar ("treslakter" - read as "woodbutcher")
The advantage of a bad memory is that one enjoys several times the same good things for the first time. (Friedrich Nietzsche)
Last edited by treslakter; 08-09-2012 at 05:01 AM.
|08-09-2012, 11:14 AM||#3|
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: New Jersey
Thanked 16 Times in 15 Posts
Thanks for the morning laughs Oily.
A day without sawdust is a day without sunshine.
delta 650, hawk G426
|08-21-2012, 07:01 PM||#4|
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Janesville, WI
Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
I like all of them. Thanks for the laughs.
Mick, - Delta P-20
A smile is a small curve that straightens everything out.
|Thread||Thread Starter||Forum||Replies||Last Post|
|Medical Healing||ChuckD||Off Topic||2||01-21-2012 02:55 AM|
|Embarrassing moment of the week..||wood-n-things||Off Topic||28||09-21-2009 04:24 AM|