Girls and guys, listen up!

[Minnesota scroller]

The Man Rules*******************
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down



Finally , the guys' side of the story.
( I must admit, it's pretty good.)
We always hear 'the rules'
From the female side.



Now here are the rules from the male side.


These are our rules!
Please note.. these are all numbered '1 '
ON PURPOSE!



1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for .


1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.


1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for exampl e, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,' We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball
or golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;


But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

Pass this to as many men as you can -
to give them a laugh.

Pass this to as many women as you can -

to give them a bigger laugh.

[minowevie]

OUCH. ok
#1 woman arn't eather.
#2 I do like it down. so if you get up in the middale of the night, don't blame me if it spits back at you
#3 whos crying. we know that don't work
#3a why ask for what we wont , we know how to get it areselfs. don't have to thank anyone
#3b. we understand yes and no. but do you?
or I do't know?
#3c. why come to you for a problem, when it is us that most always solves it anyway.
#3d, why bother asking anything during commershals. thats when you say get me this, get me that. what do you mean your cooking.
#3E. we understand that any thing you say, is only lasting for the moment. so why bother. I will ask a friend.
#3F, of couse we understand, you majickly know deritions. why use a map or fallow advice. you know it all. If we are lost, you planed it that way. just so you can be the hero.
#3G. of course we understand why you intch. you need to shower more.
#3H, if something is rough, of course we wont bother you with it. for we know you don't give a C--- any way.
#3I, If we ask a quistion. we know you don't know the answer, for you didn't cair or listen to the quistion anyway.
#3J, We don't cair if we are fat. no one sees us anyway. better warmth in the winter, and shade in the summer.
#3K, please mess up. becouse we like you slipping on the couch also. NOW we can rest with out all the snoring. and punching, and snivaling.and swetting. and mmmmm
#4 who gets up to make brakfus. and who lets the dogs out. and who cleans up the mess from every one. and who shopes and smooshes all the ouweys. and where is the back scratcher. and what.
Ps. who gives a hoot about shoues, wheres my tools.
you birthday shop, you Xmas shop. you grochery shop. You clean the bathroom .you clean the stove. you worry about where every one is. and if they are safe. oh. I got it wait for a comershiel. ok. Where is what.???

[Doc249HMCS]

Evie,
Did he hit a nerve?

[ajay]

Ooooh. I think that hit Evie's "hot button" - Ha!!!!!

[minowevie]

Well I guess, just hate this you wowman, me man thing. arent we friends, and partners. why did we get together anyway. job duties, or friendship. and partnership. sorry, I just hate it. still your friend Evie, really.