yet another blond joke - Scroll Saw Woodworking & Crafts Message Board

heavykevy · 03-04-2008, 10:14 PM

A blind man entered a lesbian bar by mistake.
He made his way to a barstool and ordered a drink.
After sitting there for a while, he yelled to the bartender in a loud
voice,
"Hey bartender, you wanna hear a dumb blonde joke?"
The bar immediately fell deathly quiet.
The woman next to him said,
"Before you tell that joke, sir, I think it's only fair, given the
fact > that you are blind, to tell you five things:

One: The bartender is a blonde woman.

Two: The bouncer is a blonde woman.

Three: The woman with me is blonde and an ice hockey goalie.

Four: The lady to your right is a blonde tennis pro.

Five: I'm a 6-foot, 200 pound blonde woman with a Ph. D., a black
belt in karate, and a very bad attitude. Now, think about it seriously,
mister.
Do you still want to tell that joke?"

The blind man thought for a second, shook his head and said,

"Nah. Not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times.

Minnesota scroller · 03-05-2008, 12:43 AM

Come on, what are the odds of that many blondes being in a lesbian bar at one time? I've heard blondes have more fun, but really now.

Good one.

Woodbutcher68 · 03-05-2008, 01:52 AM

I just wanna know where that bar is!
I'm a lesbian trapped in a man's body!

oops99 · 03-05-2008, 07:41 AM

Fred,
That is the "BEST" comeback for a joke I've seen here yet. ATTA-BOY

Tom

Doc249HMCS · 03-05-2008, 06:24 PM

A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature. Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?"

She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"

DukeNukem · 03-05-2008, 06:28 PM

That's funny.Jerry

Marsha · 03-05-2008, 06:39 PM

Then there's the one about the Blonde Guy who boards a plane at LaQuardia airport, He promptly takes a seat in first class.
The stewardess comes along checking the tickets and discovers the Blonde Guy has a ticket for economy class. The stewardess says to the Blonde Guy "Sir you're sitting in the wrong seat, please go find a seat in economy class". The Blonde Guy dosen't move, he just ignores the stewardess. The stewadess is very frustrated after asking the Blonde Guy several times to move, so she goes to the captain.
The stewardess says to the captain "Sir we have a Blonde Guy sitting in first class who should be in economy and he will not move".
The captain says "I'll take care of it".
The captain goes back to the Blond Guy and whispers in his ear, and the Blonde Guy gets up and goes to economy.
The stewardess is so shocked, she ask the captain what he said, the captain replied "I ask the Blond Guy where he was going, when he replied Atlantic City, I told him first class dosen't go to Atlantic City.

PuzzledMoose · 03-05-2008, 07:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Doc249HMCS

A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night....

That's one I hadn't heard ..lol Definitely one to forward to my blonde niece...

Minnesota scroller · 03-05-2008, 09:13 PM

Marsha, that's a good one. However, I have never heard a blonde male joke. I didn't think that was legal.

PuzzledMoose · 03-05-2008, 11:36 PM

You can't have a blonde male in England, Mike. Males are blond ....

03-04-2008, 10:14 PM	#1
heavykevy Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Shambaugh, Ia Posts: 102	yet another blond joke A blind man entered a lesbian bar by mistake. He made his way to a barstool and ordered a drink. After sitting there for a while, he yelled to the bartender in a loud voice, "Hey bartender, you wanna hear a dumb blonde joke?" The bar immediately fell deathly quiet. The woman next to him said, "Before you tell that joke, sir, I think it's only fair, given the fact > that you are blind, to tell you five things: One: The bartender is a blonde woman. Two: The bouncer is a blonde woman. Three: The woman with me is blonde and an ice hockey goalie. Four: The lady to your right is a blonde tennis pro. Five: I'm a 6-foot, 200 pound blonde woman with a Ph. D., a black belt in karate, and a very bad attitude. Now, think about it seriously, mister. Do you still want to tell that joke?" The blind man thought for a second, shook his head and said, "Nah. Not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times. __________________ When you hit rock bottom the only answer is to look up

03-05-2008, 12:43 AM	#2
Minnesota scroller Moderator Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: SW MN Posts: 1,698	Come on, what are the odds of that many blondes being in a lesbian bar at one time? I've heard blondes have more fun, but really now. Good one. __________________ Mike Making sawdust with a Dremel 1680. www.picturetrail.com/naturephotos

03-05-2008, 01:52 AM	#3
Woodbutcher68 Senior Member Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Hammond, IN Posts: 871	I just wanna know where that bar is! I'm a lesbian trapped in a man's body! __________________ Fred There's a fine line between woodworking and insanity, I'm just not sure which side of the line I'm on!

03-05-2008, 07:41 AM	#4
oops99 Tom B. Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: New York Posts: 509	Fred, That is the "BEST" comeback for a joke I've seen here yet. ATTA-BOY Tom __________________ oops99 KEEP THE PIECE Glue it back on, they'll never notice. DW788

03-05-2008, 06:24 PM	#5
Doc249HMCS Senior Member Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: California Posts: 734	A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature. Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?" She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?" __________________ Doc249HMCS DeWalt 788 and Dremel 1680

03-05-2008, 06:28 PM	#6
DukeNukem Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 1,172	That's funny.Jerry __________________ Don't worry be scrolling

03-05-2008, 06:39 PM	#7
Marsha Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Hamilton Ontario Posts: 1,403	Then there's the one about the Blonde Guy who boards a plane at LaQuardia airport, He promptly takes a seat in first class. The stewardess comes along checking the tickets and discovers the Blonde Guy has a ticket for economy class. The stewardess says to the Blonde Guy "Sir you're sitting in the wrong seat, please go find a seat in economy class". The Blonde Guy dosen't move, he just ignores the stewardess. The stewadess is very frustrated after asking the Blonde Guy several times to move, so she goes to the captain. The stewardess says to the captain "Sir we have a Blonde Guy sitting in first class who should be in economy and he will not move". The captain says "I'll take care of it". The captain goes back to the Blond Guy and whispers in his ear, and the Blonde Guy gets up and goes to economy. The stewardess is so shocked, she ask the captain what he said, the captain replied "I ask the Blond Guy where he was going, when he replied Atlantic City, I told him first class dosen't go to Atlantic City. __________________ LIFE'S SHORT, USE IT WELL

03-05-2008, 09:13 PM	#9
Minnesota scroller Moderator Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: SW MN Posts: 1,698	Marsha, that's a good one. However, I have never heard a blonde male joke. I didn't think that was legal. __________________ Mike Making sawdust with a Dremel 1680. www.picturetrail.com/naturephotos

03-05-2008, 11:36 PM	#10
PuzzledMoose Newly Customized Moose Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Truro, Nova Scotia Posts: 2,603	You can't have a blonde male in England, Mike. Males are blond .... __________________ Ian Scrolling with a Dewalt 788

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